Name calling.... Teasing.... Misunderstanding.... Non-Acceptance....
While we were in Cameron on Saturday, we originally wanted to eat at Texas Burger/Subway. The place was really slow and we had a lot of family so we decided to go down the street to Dairy Queen. Before we could leave for DQ, though, Tim heard a little boy repeating "monkey ears" and his mom was trying to get him to be quiet. I was in the restroom when Tim heard him so I don't know how the little boy said it. In my mind all I can see is that little boy pointing and saying "monkey ears" loudly so everyone could hear it. But I'm pretty sure that's not how it happened. By the time I left the restroom, the little boy was crying so I'm sure he got in trouble for saying it.
Tim didn't tell me he heard him until we were on our way home. I knew something was wrong but I just thought it was because he was tired. He wasn't going to tell me because he didn't want to ruin my day like it had his. I was upset the whole ride home and it probably would have leeched into the evening but we stopped by Billy & Julie's.
I'm pretty sure the event was compounded by Auggie wearing an outfit with monkeys on it. And I'm pretty sure I will never put Auggie in a monkey outfit again.
On a mom's forum, I asked for advice on how people would respond to a situation like this and I received very different answers... Tell them off rudely; Explain to them what TCS is and how everyone is different but we're all pretty much the same anyway; Yell and holler and walk away; Just walk away. One mom responded and said Tim & I should get together and talk about how we'd deal with situations like this.
And you know, we have. We talked about it a lot especially when we were at the Ronald McDonald House in Austin. I know we talked about it and it varied from beating up the little kid who teases Auggie to crying to talking with the kid's parents. I've even thought about making little flyers with facts about TCS to give to people if I'm too upset to talk about it. Lame, I know.. but it's an option.
When Tim told me about the little boy, all those responses were absent from my mind and all I could do was cry. I keep telling myself we'll get used to having comments about Auggie but I'm pretty sure I'll never get used to it. It won't get old when Auggie comes home from school upset about being different or being made fun of. It just won't.
I do know what will get old, though- me crying every time it happens. It's already old how much I cry and get upset now so I can't imagine being okay with it when Auggie's older. I want to know how to grow a new layer of skin so I can hide all these emotions I wear on my shoulders.
I want to be quick witted and smart and not give a damn what people say. I don't want to hesitate when TCS is brought up... I want to be able to clearly explain what it is and not let my emotions shoot to the surface. I want to be able to give that to Auggie when he's older so he won't care either.
How do you become like that? How can I grow that second layer? So that's what I'll be working on among tons of other things.. growing that second layer...
I'll leave you with some more pictures of Auggie....
|Watching all the kids play at Mainly Music|
|Swinging while Daddy plays rugby|
|Big Ol' Belly|
|CLICK TO SEE BIGGER|